What's LOVE got to do with it?

In our modern society, we are fascinated and ruled by the thought of Romantic Love.
Hearts, Flowers, Candy, Long walks in the moonlight. 
But my Ancestors probably did not have that same luxury.  The Ancestors in my tree had to scramble, work and starve as they eked out a life. The thought of Romantic Love probably never entered their minds.

As I have written about, my first Cockerham relative was married to a Cherokee woman in the late 1700's. Did he love her in that way? More than likely he needed a woman for several reasons; an ambassador to the tribal lands he wanted to explore,  a work mate, a sex partner, someone to raise his children, tend his stock and mend his clothes. Was his wife in love with him? Or did she do as she was told by her parents or tribe? Did she regret hitching her life to his? There are no letters, diaries or family history to say either way. They raised several children together, and those children were successful, so I must imagine the union was successful as well.

My 4x Great Grandfather Samuel married a girl that was close to his family in location. Theirs was a union of convenience I'm sure. Elisabeth already had a child by an unknown man, though Samuel was her first marriage. When Samuel died late in the Civil War, she was already pregnant with his brothers child. She married the brother, James S.A. within two months of Samuel dying. Did She love James? Again, it's hard to know what was in her mind, except providing for her living children. She went on to birth 10 more by James.

David and Eva Harms and Family

Recently I was gifted with copies of a diary set down by my 2xGreat Grandmothers husband, David Harms. David was a Russian immigrant, Eva was a Polish immigrant. They both went to the same Mennonite church. I think David saw her first, as Eva worked as a maid for David's brother, as well as tended children at church functions. One day he went into the nursery and declared his fondness for her, and declared he wanted to be her husband. She was surprised, to be sure.

David wrote, " We decided to pray on this matter. Later we agreed that this was God's plan for us. I took her to be a gift from God, for me. We drove to her parents to ask her father Unruh, he said,  "Na, Eva. Waut welst dru met dem Russa Jung?"  We were of different dialects, she came from Poland, and I from Russia. We could hardly understand each other, but love is the same language, which we can all understand. We were married August 1 1881."
Later Eva wrote that when David was sick and bound to die, she spent the night next to his bed praying for her beloved husband to recover. He did.

Closer to my generation, my Grandmother Laura Gloeckler absolutely fell in love with my Grandfather. She was Eva's Granddaughter. Laura had been sent ahead of her family from Canada to Wasco, California. She was 15 years old and a long way from her home and most of her family. I believe she met Wally through a friend. Laura had never been considered a handsome girl, she was gawky and 'low'. But she fell in love and  Wally fell in love with her. They were married May 30, 1931. They had three children.
A testament to this is a strange story that Laura recounted to me.
She was pregnant with their first child, and went to a maternity home to give birth. There, to her surprise, she gave birth to twin boys. The Doctor knew she was having twins, but didn't want to scare her, so he kept that information from her. Both boys were very small. One was particularly weak, and not really expected to survive. The Doctor took my Grandfather aside and told him he should leave the weak baby there, were they would take care of it until it died. Wally took one look at Laura and the two babies in her arms and refused. Though they had little money, he went home and emptied and drawer, lined it with blankets and brought Laura and the two babies home, where both boys thrived.
They were married for over 50 years.

Unusual names and Anchor People

As I work my way through my genealogy tree, I have found some unusual names. I call these my  'Anchors'.

Thural D Berry age 7

For me, Anchors are the ones that have names so unusual it is easy to find them in records and other family trees. They stand out like a beacon in a census or a newspaper article, on a gravestone or in a diary. In a sea of Williams. Johns and Alice's, Anchors are a welcome relief.

If you have a common surname, you are praying for Anchors.

My surname is Berry. Pretty common, especially in the Ozarks and in Tennessee and Kentucky. There were lots of Berry's because they were having lots of children.  The Families lived deep in the woods, on the Current River, in the Ozarks and throughout the south. The settlements were remote and small; there weren't too many opportunities for selecting a mate. In other words, our gene pool was mighty shallow! Often a family of brothers married a family of sisters.
In my family if a brother died, another brother married his wife and took care of her children. Of course then they usually had more children. So the ol' family tree has some pretty twisted up branches and a lot of confusion.

My first Anchor in the Berry Family tree is Pridgen Berry. Born to Samuel Berry and Elizabeth Ann Melton, May 15, 1856. The path from myself to Pridgen is very straight forward,It's easy to keep his name straight in my mind and in my tree. But for cousins of mine, the path is a little more convoluted.
You see, Samuel and his brothers joined the Confederate Army. Sam died in the Battle of Franklin, November 1864,in Tennessee and Isaac was captured and sent to a Prisoner of War camp. As we know from previous posts, Isaac was allowed to leave once he swore not to take up arms against the Union ever again. Family legend has it that Isaac walked away from the POW camp, and never contacted his family again. Of course with the internet, we are now able to find him, but that isn't the story I'm telling.
Samuel was gone to war, but his younger brother, James Anderson Berry stayed home to help the family survive. Samuel and Elizabeth were married in May 1854. Their first daughter was born in 1854, but I don't know which month. Pridgen was born in 1856, and Isabella the 2nd daughter was born in 1859. Clementine, 3rd daughter was born in 1861, while Samuel was away at war. She was raised by Fereba Jane Benton Berry~ Samuel's son's Pridgen's wife's 2nd cousin. ( Fereba is another Anchor).
Now Samuel died November 1864. And Elizabeth married his brother James Anderson Berry very soon after and had a son, who she named James A Berry on Christmas Day 1864. She had 8 more children by James Anderson. Her last child was born in 1876. And to top it all off, she also cared for a step son- Henry Berry- born in 1839 to her 2nd husband James Anderson and his (?)Cousin Polly Holland.

Confused yet? I have a large piece of paper with my family tree filled in. I'm sure there are better ways- but I had to write the names all down, connected by lines and arrows. Notes decorate the margins. I still get confused!

You can see how glad I was that I come from Pridgens line!  I always had wondered about the strangeness of that name. When I finally had time to research the female side of the Berry family I found out.

Thural D Berry and William 'Cort' Berry. Circa 1954

Elizabeth's mother was Margaret Vester" Little Cloud" Benton, born in 1810 in Tennessee. ( Another Anchor), her mother was Lucy ( or Levy) Pridgen, born in 1746, Edgecomb, North Carolina. So to my delight I found it to be a family name.

Other Anchors are Mourning, Morning Star, Thural (my father- still don't know where that came from!) Henry Clay 'Au Nuk Ka Tah', and Judge Henry Clay. A lot of the men were named for revered Commanders in the Civil War or famous Political figures. The women had more sedate names, but Makhindra and Melvina do stand out from the rest.

So we can see that even though our current generation of baby makers are naming their children things like, ABCD, and Blanket, it is in no way a 20th or 21st Century trend.

And had I thought of it, I might have christened my children with names that would have made them Anchors too.

But perhaps Virginia and Amelia are just 'old fashioned' enough to qualify!

Challenge

I have a tendency to think of challenges as huge obstacles to overcome.

But of course, a challenge can be as small as a single step.
Websters calls it,1) 'To demand an explanation or justification" 2) "to question the truth of"

That is an AHA! moment if ever I heard one!
As I have gone on to research various branches of my tree I have tapped into such sites as Ancestry, Find a Grave, Family Search, My Heritage and some others. And on more than one occasion I have climbed up into the branches of the wrong tree!

How can that be? Isn't this information verified?
Tricky question, that.
I think it is to some extent, verified. But if your information is wrong and you add it to your site believing it is RIGHT, then you have done us all a grave dis service.

 My first 'challenge' is to justify, to make the truth known, and not add unverified information to the tree.

Louisa B Theis. Undoubtedly the saddest portrait I've ever seen

The 2nd puzzle, ( I hesitate to call it a challenge) is my Great Great Grandmother  Louisa B Theis.
She is buried next to my Grandfather, I've been visiting her grave since I was born. She was one of the first people I have tried to research. She remains shrouded in mystery and sadness.

Born Feb 25,1844 , the country of her birth is still unknown to me. I catch up to her in 1872 or 1873 in Columbus, Ohio. Miss Louisa B Theiss worked for the Ohio State School for the Blind as a seamstress. She made $18.00 a month. I am fairly certain that she was an immigrant, but from where? There were several Theis Families in Columbus at the time, and I do not know Louisa's fathers first name. In fact his last name might even be an anglicized version of Theissen or something similar.


I can only imagine what the Civil War years were like for her living in Columbus Ohio, if indeed that is where she lived. There was a Civil War Confederate Prisoner of War camp in Columbus early in the War. If the captured soldiers swore never to return to their Companies and fight, they could walk around the town. Did Louisa meet a Rebel Prisoner?Was she afraid? Since all of the eligible men and boys were off fighting the war, I am sure there were very few Romantic possibilities for her as a young woman. My 2X Great Grandfather was a Policeman somewhere in Franklin County, but I do not know what year, or even which city. Another Challenge for me to puzzle over.

William Wallace Regester. My 2X great Grandfather.

Louisa was considered quite old when she married my 2xGreat Grandfather William Regester in Franklin, Ohio July 13, 1875. They both would have been 31 years old. He had already served as a Private, Company B, 113 Regiment, Ohio Voluntary Infantry. In August, 1862, age 18 he joined the Army. He mustered out July 6, 1865.

Albert Wallace Regester,aged 16. Taken in Antioch California.

Albert Wallace Regester, age 20. Taken in San Francisco Ca 1899

Their first child was my Great Grandfather Albert Wallace Regester, born in Franklin Co. Ohio in 1879.

Rebica Regester, age 6 months

The second child was a daughter, Rebica (Rebecca?) born 1882. Unfortunately Rebica died a year later in April, 1883 of Brain Fever ( Meningitis). William died in Sept 1884 of Tuberculosis contracted while he was serving in the Army. So at age 40, Louisa was a widow with a young son to care for.
I lose track of Louisa then, not knowing when or how or why she traveled West to California.But the top photo of my Great Grandfather Albert has the stamp of a photographer in Antioch, California. That photo was taken when he was 16 years old, so they must have come before 1895. I find her again near Albany, California,running a boarding house around the turn of the Century.
I know that she died in Contra Costa County and is buried in a family plot in Antioch California. Her son Albert, and Albert's son Wallace - my Grandfather- lay now beside her.

Albert Wallace Regester, taken 1933. He died in 1938 near Antioch, California.

Albert Wallace "Wally" Regester, my Grandfather. Taken about 1933

I've always tried to Challenge myself to find my ancestors using the internet and family letters, as well as free sites. But Louisa always remains just beyond my reach.

She is the first one I wanted to research and she has been the most difficult, the most challenging and will ultimately be the biggest reward, should I succeed in laying out her story.

Ancestry- here I come.